Admitting It’s Time for Extra help

Like many in the caregiving generation, I was juggling a full-time job, my own life, and my mom’s needs.

I eventually reached a point where I could see she was slipping.
Cooking, taking meds on time, and staying engaged were becoming a struggle for her.

Back when I was still working, I spent my days half-focused on my desk and half-anxious about what was happening at home.

Hiring help wasn’t about giving up.
It was the only way to keep our heads above water.

My mom has always been an independent lady.
She never asked for help in her life.

To her, she was managing it just fine and a caregiver was just a waste of money.

I knew that for this to work, she had to be the one to accept the change.
If she felt forced, she would just push back.

I had to approach this carefully so she didn’t feel like she was losing her autonomy.

We didn’t talk about what she couldn’t do anymore.
Instead, we talked about how a helper would handle the tiring chores.

This lets her focus her energy on the things she actually enjoys.
Like her community programs or her favorite TV shows.

Involve your senior before you even post an ad or call the agency.
Ask: “What’s the one chore you’d happily never do again?”

Getting them to identify a “win” makes them a partner in the hire.
If they feel they are hiring with you, they are much less likely to push back.

It turns a scary change into a choice they made for themselves.

How did you parent react when you first suggested help? Drop a comment below!

Up Next: Finding a Caregiver with Heart (Part 2) — How to interview a caregiver: Finding the right fit.
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